When looking at the relationships that trigger us, it helps to understand that Like Attracts Like.

It isn’t necessarily anything to do with external circumstances (social, economic or relationship status), rather that the other person’s internal state is reflecting our own internal state back to us. 

Or more simply, your fears and their fears will match up in some way. 

It is important to note that reasons why the fear exists could be different (i.e. it was borne from a different type of trauma or it’s a different karmic theme), but the connection itself will always be relative. 

It could be that a fear of commitment is being echoed back by someone else’s. The reason for that fear could stem from totally different experiences and karma, however, the fact that both parties carry the fear itself, will be what matches up. As a result that perception gets magnified: when both people come together, they both end up facing their fears in themselves and each other.

How Come?

Conscious shift doesn’t necessarily mean conscious change. We can try to apply and adapt “new” behaviors in order to yield a different result, but the reality is that until we shift the issue internally, nothing really changes on the surface. 

We all operate on different vibrational frequencies and the less fear we have, the higher the vibration we operate at. As we transcend our fears, which are keeping us trapped and holding us back from living our fullest potential, we raise our vibration. 

We tend to be attracted to and remain in relationships with people who have the same vibrational frequency as we do. That means that the less fear we carry, the more we will attract the same. 

Like LITERALLY Attracts Like. 

Now, our feelings don’t define us and it is not our immediate feelings which inform our vibration. Identifying them doesn’t mean we become them: they are simply the tool to get us to see how we have been triggered by a relationship. Once we are able to do so, we are able to see what fears we hold. 

The more fear we transcend, the lighter we become, and the lighter the people we attract will be.